.Editor's Keep in mind: The observing is actually the text message of a letter from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Retired), reviewing the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written quite concerning specifics of this particular purpose during the month I have actually been listed here, generally for 2 causes: the initial being actually that there has been actually really little bit of opportunity to accomplish that type of composing, as well as furthermore, since I'm uncertain how pleasant I am actually discussing ideas I share with friends and family along with the remainder of the planet.Properly, obviously the world changed today. What I say or even carry out is incredibly small contrasted to the significance of what happened to our nation today when it was struck by ... through whom? Terrorists is actually all we understand, I suspect. Tough to understand at whom to guide our rage and also worry ...I had actually merely completed a lot of tasks this morning, one of the most time-consuming being the physical exams of all team members. In a personal discussion following that, the trip plastic surgeon informed me they were possessing a very poor day on the ground. I had no idea ...He defined the condition to me as absolute best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually thrown for a loop, after that terrified. My 1st thought was actually that this had not been a genuine chat, that I was still listening to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It only didn't appear achievable on this incrustation in our country. I could not even picture the details, also before the news of more destruction began coming in.Vladimir came by pretty swiftly, sensing that one thing really major was being explained. I swung Michael into the element too. They were additionally astonished and stunned. After our company signed off, I attempted to clarify to Vladimir and Michael as best I could the possible measurement of the show of fear in midtown Manhattan and at the Pentagon. They precisely recognized and also were very understanding.I browsed the Globe Chart on the computer to find where over the planet we were actually and saw that our team were coming southeast out of Canada as well as would certainly be actually passing over New England in a handful of mins. I whized around the station up until I found a home window that would offer me a sight of New York City and snatched the closest cam. It happened to be a camera, and also I was actually appearing south coming from the window of Michael's cabin.The smoke seemed to have a weird flower to it at the foundation of the column that was actually streaming south of the urban area. After going through among the news articles our team merely received, I believe our team were actually checking out NY around the amount of time of, or even not long after, the crash of the second high rise. Just how awful ...I swept the cam all along the East Coastline to the south to observe if I could see some other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, but nothing showed up.It was quite complicated to think about job afterwards, though our experts possessed some to perform, however on the next orbit our experts went across the US further southern. All three people were operating one or two cams to try to get scenery of Nyc or even Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, but no details source can be seen. It all appeared unbelievable from 2 to 3 hundred kilometers away. I can't envision the unfortunate scenes on the ground.Apart from the psychological effect of our nation being tackled and also thousands of our people as well as possibly some pals being actually eliminated, the best mind-boggling sensation being actually where I am is just one of isolation.Upcoming time ... I reckon the exhaustion and emotional tension got the best of me. I couldn't stay awake as well as continue to create. Today was actually still difficult, but we began obtaining even more info, plus our company had the respect of talking straight with the Center Director, Roy Estess, who assured our company that the ground teams will continue to work as well as guarantee our safety, along with the secure operation of the Station. Our team likewise talked to our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that incorporated that the partners in the Course are all completely dedicated to continuing risk-free procedures and help. These were never ever inquiries for me. I understand all these individuals! The ground staffs have been astonishingly supportive, really understanding of the impact of the news, and have attempted to become as practical as feasible. They have all been actually incredibly qualified and centered though I can not envision the distraction of this kind of headlines being available in and the notion that federal government properties may be in jeopardy. They never skipped a beat, also when moving control centers. As well as a team of elderly staffs as well as good friends offered us a fairly complete rundown about what was known as well as what was being actually carried out in the government as well as at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was quite handy and also type of them to accomplish in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has also been helpful and beneficial, making an effort to uplink news articles when our personal possessions were unusable, as well as mentioning kind phrases ...My crewmates have been fantastic, also. They recognize it's been a hard time for me and also the individuals on the ground, and they have actually made an effort to become as even keeled and beneficial as possible. Michael even corrected me my favorite Borscht soup for dinner. And also they give me lots of area to presume when I needed it. They are very considerate as well as certainly shocked at whoever would perform this.I understand plenty of folks in Washington, numerous individuals who take a trip to DC and New York City, numerous who are actually captains, that I experienced certain I will get at least a couple of items of bad news over the next few days. I got the 1st one today when I discovered that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that hit the Government was Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I met Chic throughout cadet summertime when we were in the D&B all together, and also we had great deals of courses all together. I can't imagine what he must of undergone, and also currently I listen to that he may have climbed additionally than our team can even think about through probably preventing his aircraft from being actually the one to deal with the White House. What a dreadful loss, yet I ensure Chic was combating fearlessly throughout. As well as splits do not stream the very same in space ...It's complicated to illustrate how it experiences to become the only American completely off the world each time like this. The emotion that I must be there along with all of you, coping with this, aiding in some way, is actually overwhelming. I understand that our experts are on the limit (or even beyond) of a horrendous change in the record of the planet. Several points will certainly never be the same once more after September 11, 2001. Certainly not merely for the manies thousand and also countless individuals directly affected by these hideous actions of violence, but most likely for we all. Our experts will discover ourselves experiencing in a different way concerning loads of things, including probably room exploration, regrettably.It's horrible to view smoke cigarettes pouring coming from cuts in your very own country coming from such an excellent viewpoint. The duality of getting on a space probe devoted to improving everyday life on the planet and also checking out lifestyle being actually ruined through such witting, dreadful process is jolting to the mind, despite who you are. And the expertise that everything will definitely be actually various than when we released due to the time our experts land is a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our country as well as in our leadership that our company will definitely perform everything feasible to much better protect her and also our households, and also to bring compensation of what has actually been actually done. I possess self-confidence that the excellent individuals at NASA will certainly do whatever essential to proceed our goal safely as well as return our company safely and securely at the right time. And I miss each one of you very much. I can't exist along with you personally, and also our experts possess a long way to visit accomplish our purpose, but be particular that my soul is along with you, and recognize you reside in my petitions.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the last character ... Fortunately, it's been actually a hectic week up below. As well as to verify that, like our country, we are advancing our desired road along with company customarily (as high as achievable). Tonight the most recent addition to the station, the Russian Docking Area are going to be introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States opportunity), it will definitely dock with our company, at a slot never made use of prior to on the low point edge of the Service Module. This brand new component will provide our company one more spot to dock a Progress or even Soyuz as well as will definitely supply a sizable airlock with 2 able to be used hatches for conducting EVA's in Russian Orlan matches, which our team will carry out a few of prior to our company get home.The concern prior to in managing this week was inadequate updates. The trouble today is actually excessive. It arrived all at once when email was brought back, and also there's not nearly enough time to review everything! Plus it is actually too difficult to deal with all of it at once. But I value receiving it, and I really appreciate the terrific letters of support and relationship I am actually getting.Our experts are actually succeeding aboard, acquiring our work carried out, as well as referring to factors. Final night our team possessed a long discussion over supper regarding the importance of these celebrations, the feasible actions to observe, as well as what ought to be performed. After supper, Michael resolved telling me that every e-mail he received from friends in Russia stated exclusively to inform me exactly how sorry they were actually that this taken place, prolonging their acknowledgements, and talking to just how I was actually doing. Vladimir educated me the Russian term for "condolences" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Urban area. (Both the Russian as well as the English terms are actually a lot too long to articulate easily.) Really type individuals.For the final 2 times, the Russian MCC has been good enough to transmit live broadcasts of broadcast updates concerning the event as well as linked stories, to ensure I was actually effectively educated. Every professional that has started the line to discuss an operation or even a complication contends some aspect prolonged introductions to me with kind phrases. Tonight the Russian capcom informed us that due to the wedding day of remembrance in the United States, throughout the day people had actually been carrying blossoms and also edging all the wall structures of the United States embassy in Moscow, as well as this night they were actually lighting candles in the street outside the consular office. Just how the world has actually modified.People anywhere seem to recognize the senselessness and also terror in this assault. As well as the enormous reduction. Moscow has actually managed these type of problems in the last couple of years with home and also train battles, so they are as troubled to do away with this risk as our experts are actually. Yet all-time low series is actually that there are excellent folks everywhere that desire to reside in peace. I read that a little one talked to, "America is therefore excellent to various other nations, our experts consistently help everybody, exactly how can they hate us a great deal?".I hope the example of participation and also depend on that this space probe plus all people in the plan demonstrate daily are going to someday motivate the rest of the globe to operate the same way. They must!Regrettably, our team will not be actually flying over the United States while individuals are actually igniting candlesticks. Don't recognize if our team could observe that anyway. Our team did, however, find a really unique and also beautiful sight a few mins ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. Our team were actually overtaking it and also it emerged regarding three moments after its own launch from Baikonur as the sun reached our station, so it was actually still at night. It looked like a huge comet with a directly, broad tail silhouetted against the black planet beneath. Even with some bad illumination for some time as the sunlight hit our home window at a reduced viewpoint, I managed some video recording of it as first our experts passed the rocket, and after that watched it begin to catch up as it acquired height and also velocity. I recorded until principal engine cutoff and also enhancer separation happened equally our experts came close to daybreak on the Mountain ranges. An extraordinary attraction in an unforgettable full week ...Life happens, even in space. Our experts are actually listed here to keep ... Frank.